''When the rain falls on my window today..''
You know I will come here, don't you?
I never felt so emotional about any exam before this.
When I first saw this place,
I spoke inside me :
''Oh Lord, just let me sit for Final tomorrow;
otherwise, just kill me right here, right now.''
And tomorrow,
is the day I always being waited.
When I sat for UPSR,
God, I didn't even see it as exam !
When I sat for PMR,
I guess it was when I being in the most normal state,
still heartbrokens drove me forwards.
When I sat for SPM,
to be honest, it was when I miss the most.
Hearbrokens just got into deeper and deeper,
til I became someone even myself couldn't recognise out.
It wasn't the best time in my life;
but it was the most sparkling moment of mine.
Then STPM,
my eternal wound that will never be healed,
never will turn into a scar.
It's the pain that constantly reminds me
to begin with the right departure.
So coming to this latest time,
my First Year BDS University Examination.
I had never feel exam is a huge stone
placing upon my chest...
But on the last wednesday,
I just dunno why,
I felt sucha a great pressure out of no where.
It's a big humiliation to me.
Even more humiliated,
when I shared this with my own father,
he got so furious and yelled on the phone.
I had been really silly.
I really had no idea I can see an exam that serious, that important.
Maybe you will think :
Please la, everybody sits for first year Final.
I forgot have I ever thank my mom before,
but definitely never in person before,
maybe I'll do it this time,
maybe.
My mom always been very sarcastic and
not really encouraging,
but she never abandon me.
She is always there,
even with lots of complaints.
She is always there,
even she didn't really sincere about it.
She is always there,
even I didn't really need her.
''Mamie, thank you so much,
for walking through all the nightmares with me,
though we both know,
those nightmares were somehow
been extra-terrified by you,
still Thank You.''
Signing off;
Hze